SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 32

SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 32The 26 letters of the English alphabet are so intelligently arranged...they show you the way of life....  "A"lways "B"e "C"ool. "D"on't have "E"go with "F"riends n Family. "G"iveup "H"urting "I"ndividuals."J"ust "K"eep "L"oving "M"an kind. "N"ever "O"mit "P"rayers. "Q"uietly "R"emember God. "S"peak "T"ruth. "U"se "V"alid "W"ords. "X"press "Y"our "Z"eal...





In 1923, nine of the wealthiest people in the world met at Chicago's Edge Water Beach Hotel .

Their combined wealth, it is estimated, exceeded the wealth of the government of the United States at that time. These men certainly knew how to make a living and accumulate wealth. Attending the meeting were the following men: 

1. The president of the largest steel company, 

2. The president of the largest utility company, 

3. The president of the largest gas company, 

4. The president of the New York Stock Exchange, 

5. The president of the Bank of International Settlements, 

6. The greatest wheat speculator, 

7. The greatest bear on Wall Street, 

8. The head of the World's greatest monopoly & 

9. A member of President Harding's cabinet. 

That's a pretty impressive line-up of people by anyone's yardstick. 

Yet, 25 years later, where were those nine industrial giants? 

Let’s examine what happened to them 25 years later. 
1. The President of the then largest steel company (Bethlehem Steel Corp), Charles M Schwab, lived on borrowed capital for five years before he died bankrupt. 

2. The President of the then largest gas company, Howard Hubson, went insane. 

3. One of the greatest commodity traders (Wheat Speculator), Arthur Cutten, died insolvent.

4. The then President of the New York Stock Exchange, Richard Whitney, was sent to jail. 

5. The member of the US President’s Cabinet (the member of President Harding's cabinet), Albert Fall, was pardoned from jail just to be able to go home and die in peace. 

6. The greatest “bear” on Wall Street, Jesse Livermore committed suicide. 

7. The President of the then world’s greatest monopoly, Ivar Krueger, committed suicide. 

8. The President of the Bank of International Settlement, Leon Fraser, committed Suicide. 

9. The president of the largest utility company, Samuel Insull, died penniless. 

What they forgot was how to "make" life while they got busy making money! 

Money in itself is not evil; it provides food for the hungry, medicine for the sick, clothes for the needy. Money is only a medium of exchange. 

We need two kinds of education: 

a) One that teaches us how to make a living 


b) One that teaches us how to live.

There are many of us who are so engrossed in our professional material life that we neglect our family, health, social and most important spiritual responsibilities. 

If asked why we do this, we would reply that "We are doing it for our family". 

Yet, our kids are sleeping when we leave home. They are sleeping when we come back home!! Twenty years later, we’ll turn back, and they’ll all be gone, to pursue their own dreams and their own lives. 

Without water, a ship cannot move. The ship needs water, but if the water gets into the ship, the ship will face existential problems. What was once a means of living for the ship will now become a means of destruction. 

Similarly we live in a time where earning is a necessity but let not the earning enter our hearts, for what was once a means of living will surely become a means of destruction for us as well.

So take a moment and ask yourself………. 
Has the water entered my ship?

I hope Not!


Long message... Worth reading..
When Swami Vivekanand was studying law at the University College, London, a white professor, whose last name was Peters, disliked him intensely.

One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room when vivekananda came along with his tray and sat next to the professor.

The professor said, "Mr Vivekanand , you do not understand. A pig and a bird do not sit together to eat."

Vivekanandji looked at him as a parent would a rude child and calmly replied, "You do not worry professor. I'll fly away," and he went and sat at another table.

Mr. Peters,  reddened with rage, decided to take revenge.

The next day in Class he posed the following question: "Mr.Vivekanand , if you were walking down the street and found a package, and within was a bag of wisdom and another bag with money, which one would you take ?"

Without hesitating, Vivekanandji responded, "The one with the money, of course."

Mr. Peters , smiling sarcastically said, "I, in your place, would have taken the wisdom."

Swami Vivekanand shrugged and responded, "Each one takes what he doesn't have."

Mr. Peters, by this time was fit to be tied. So great was his anger that he wrote on Swami Vivekanand's exam sheet the word "idiot" and gave it to Swami Vivekanand.

Vivekanandji took the exam sheet and sat down at his desk trying very hard to remain calm while he contemplated his next move.

A  few  minutes later, Swami Vivekanand got up, went to the professor and told him in a dignified polite tone, "Mr. Peters, you signed the sheet, but you did not give me the grade."

Don't mess with intelligent people..


3 people were waiting at the gates of heaven

Only one can enter...

I was a priest. I have worshipped you all my life.

I was a doctor. I have served you all my life.

I was a teacher. Apart feom teaching I had to perform the following duties,

Attendance record,

Defaulter lists,

Official work,

Administrative work,

Social work,

Aptitude tests,

Group discussions,

Entrepreneurship cell,


Practical oral exams,


R & D cell,

NSS activities,


Intra college events,




Faculty Development prog,

Exam duty,

Election duty,

Admission Round duty,


Term work,


Paper Checking,

Paper setting,


Remedial classes,

Industrial visits,






Student Clubs,

Pamphlet design,

Banner design,

Guest lectures,

Annual sports,

Traditional day,

Annual gathering,


2 to 5 hrs per week stay after working hrs,

Please stop!
Don't make me cry
You have already gone through hell,

Welcome to heaven!

All those who says teaching is an easy job...

Salute to all teachers...


Man O Man!
When without money,
eats vegetables at home;
When has money,
eats the same vegetables in a fine restaurant.
When without money, rides bicycle;
When has money rides the same ‘exercise machine’.
When without money walks to earn food
When has money, walks to burn fat;

Man O Man! Never fails to deceive thyself!
When without money,
wishes to get married;
When has money,
wishes to get divorced.
When without money,
wife becomes secretary;
When has money,
secretary becomes wife.
When without money, acts like a rich man;
When has money acts like a poor man.
Man O Man! Never can tell the simple truth!
Says share market is bad,
but keeps speculating;
Says money is evil,
but keeps accumulating.
Says high Positions are lonely,
but keeps wanting them.
Says gambling & drinking is bad,
but keeps indulging;

Man O Man! Never means what he says and never says what he means..!!