SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 17

“Attitude Matters"

Once a Bird asked a Bee: After constant hard-work, you prepare honey. But a
 man comes & steals it. Do you  not  feel  sad ?

Wonderful  reply  by  Bee: Never...  Because  only  thing  man  can  do  is  to steal  'my  honey'...  not  the  'art  of  making  honey'...
In  this  world,  anyone  can  copy  your  CREATIONS  but  no  one  can  copy  your  TALENT...........

SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 17
Terrible English by PT sir:

1) There is no wind in the football..
2) I talk, he talk, why you middle talk?.
3) You rotate the ground 4 times..
4) You go and understand the tree.
5) I'll give you clap on ur cheeks..
6) Bring your parents and your mother and especially your father.
7) Close the window airforce is coming.
8) I have two daughters and both are girls..
9) Stand in a straight circle..
10) Don't stand in front of my back
11) Why Haircut not cut..?
12) Don't make noise.. principle is rotating in the corridor
13) Why are you looking at the monkey outside the window when I’m here?
14) You talking bad habit
15) Give me a red pen of any colour.
16) Can i have some snow in my cold drink?
17) Pick the paper and fall into the dustbin.
18) Both of u stand together separately.
19) Keep quiet the principal just passed away!!
Dont laugh alone pass it....


If you fail , never give up - because
FAIL = First Attempt In Learning
end is not the end , its in fact
END = Effort Never Dies
If you get No as answer , don't worry
NO = Next Opportunity

Ek Maa Ke Liye
Woh Kaun sa Kaam Hai
Jo Beta kare tho Buraa
aur Damad kare tho Accha He ?
- Biwi Ki Gulami


Some global opinions on marriages..

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
- Al Gore

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
- Mike Tyson

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
- Bill Clinton

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
- George W. Bush

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
- Michael Jordan

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming:
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it.
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Shaquille O'Neal

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once..
- Kobe Bryant

You know what I did before I married?? Anything I wanted to.
- David Hasselhoff

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
- Alec Baldwin

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
- Barack Obama

When you are in love,
Wonders happen.

But once you get married,
You wonder, what happened.

An Excellent Line...
"Marriage is a beautiful forest where Brave Lions are killed by beautiful Deer's".

All husbands can enjoy


Married men's brain is divided into 2 parts -
Right and Left
In right , nothing is left
In left , nothing is right


Position of a Husband is like Split AC !!
No matter how loud he is outside , He is deisgned to remain
Silent , Cool and controlled by remote !


Example of a smart doctor
Nurse: “Sir, Your Wife’s Phone”

Doctor: “What’s The Matter?”

Nurse: “She Wants To Kiss You”

Doctor: “I’m Busy, You Take Her Kiss & Give Me Later“


Wife: sunoji circus dekhne chale???

Husband : No......... I m busy

Wife : Usme ek ladki ne bina kapdon ke sher pe sawari ki hai. ...!!!!!

Husband : bahut ziddi ho gayi ho....Har baat zidd karke manvati ho....
Chalo bahut din hue sher nahin dekha....!!!!!

Iske Aage ki kahaani...

Husband & wife phir circus dekhne gaye. husband ne sabse aage wali seat ki ticket bhi le li...
Lion show aaya aur chala gaya par bina kapadon ki ladki nahi aayi...Circus show khatam ho gaya...

Husband : Tumne toh kaha tha ki ek ladki bina kapdon ke aayegi?

Wife : Bina kapdo ke toh sher kaha tha, ladki nahi........

I swear you will read it again

Click here for more such jokes collections