SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 37

SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 37Its Hard to pedal a cycle, so we shift to a bike...then we shift to more comfort, we buy a car...because of that we develop a tummy & join the Gym. In the Gym they again give you a cycle ...

this is called a

 "Life Cycle" 

A man went to Guru Nanak Sahib and asked, "What's the value of life?"
Gurunanak ji gave him one stone and said, "Find out the value of this
stone, but don't sell it."
The man took the stone to an Orange Seller and asked him what its
cost would be.
The Orange Seller saw the shiny stone and said, "You ca take 12
oranges and give me the stone."
The man apologized and said that the guru has asked him not to sell it.
He went ahead and found a vegetable seller. "What could be the value
of this stone?" he asked the vegetable seller.
The seller saw the shiny stone and said, "Take one sack of potatoes
and give me the stone."
The man again apologized and said he can't sell it.
Further ahead, he went into a jewelery shop and asked the value of the
The jeweler saw the stone under a lens and said, "I'll give you 50 Lakhs
for this stone." When the man shook his head, the jeweler said, "Alright,
alright, take 2 crores, but give me the stone."
The man explained that he can't sell the stone.
Further ahead, the man saw a precious stone's shop and asked the
seller the value of this stone.
When the precious stone's seller saw the big ruby, he lay down a red
cloth and put the ruby on it. Then he walked in circles around the ruby
and bent down and touched his head in front of the ruby. "From where
did you bring this priceless ruby from?" he asked. "Even if I sell the
whole world, and my life, I won't be able to purchase this priceless
Stunned and confused, the man returned to the guru and told him what
had happened. "Now tell me what is the value of life, guru ji?"
Gurunanak said, "The answers you got from the Orange Seller, the
Vegetable Seller, the Jeweler & the Precious Stone's Seller explain the
value of our life... You may be a precious stone, even priceless, but
people will value you based on their financial status, their level of
information, their belief in you, their motive behind entertaining you,
their ambition, and their risk taking ability. But don't fear, you will surely
find someone who will discern your true value."
Respect yourself.
You are also Unique.
No one can Replace you!
Be yourself๐Ÿ‘

Grandfather : when I was your age, I used to take two rupees to 
the market 
and bring home. 
soap, rice, milk,bread, ghee,and face powder  etc.๐Ÿ˜Š

Grandson : nowadays it is difficult.....there are cctv๐Ÿ“น
cameras everywhere

๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡HEIGHTS ๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡

Height of Fashion:
Lungi with a zip.

Height of Laziness:
Asking lift for morning walk.

Height of Craziness:
Get blank paper xerox.

Height of Honesty:
Pregnant woman taking 2 tickets.

Height of de-hydration:
Cow giving milk powder.

Height of Hope:
A 99 yr. Old woman going for 295/-recharge to get lifetime incoming.

Height of Stupidity:
Looking through key hole of a glass door.

Height of Suicide Attempt:
A dwarf jumps from the footpath on the road.

Height of friendship:
It's when your friend runs away with your wife ....
And you are really worried for your friend !!

 Height of Attitude:
A Sleeping Beggar puts a Notice Board in front of Him..
Please Do not make noise by dropping coins!!
Use Currency notes.

Height Of Work Pressure:
An Employee Opens His Tiffin Box On The Road Side To See,Whether He Is Going To office, Or Coming Back From office.


■ How important 
is a father in one’s life?

Mothers are the Soul of our homes... whereas fathers are their very existence.

But have we ever given much thought to the nature of this 

Little is written or said about fathers, even though we understand their value in our lives.

We hardly ever hear anyone talk about fathers. .. 
Mothers are made of an ocean of tears. Fathers are a wall of self-control.

Mothers relieve their pain through tears, fathers only console, and it is harder to console than it is to cry. 

Surely the candlestick is hotter than the flame, yet
it is always the flame which gets the praise.

We remember mothers as the ones who took care of our daily needs, yet how easily we forget fathers, who arrange finances for daily needs!

Mothers can cry uncontrollably in public, and fathers sob in their pillows at night.

Mothers are allowed to cry; fathers can never be seen in tears.

We can notice the patches on his shoes. His tattered vest is a sure sign of the struggle he gone through. His unshaven beard is a sign of his frugality. He will buy new pairs of expensive jeans for his children, while an old pair of pyjamas will do for him.

While children don’t blink an eyelid when they spend 1000's of Rs in a beauty parlour or salon, yet in their own home, a father may be using whatever is at home to avoid any salon or parlour visits. 

When a father is ill, he does 
not rush to the doctor. He does not fear his illness
but is afraid in case the doctor tells him to rest for a month, as there will be no other bread earner in the family.

Whether he can afford it 
or not, he works hard to get his son admitted to an
engineering or medical course.
Despite the shortage of funds he send money regularly to his child at university even some children go on a gala spending spree on the same day the money arrives.

The Father is the existence of the 
home. The home is secure from outsiders when a father, in the form of its manger, is alive. He holds the position of the chief executive of the household. He sees, repairs and cares for jobs around the house.

When you announce your exam results, it seems that mother is the closest person to you because she takes you in her arms, praises you and blesses you, but no one notices the father who quietly slips away to the sweet shop to get sweets to distribute among family and friends...

God made paradise under the feet of your mother but he made the father take care of the thorns under your feet.... 

♢ Salute to All Fathers 
            of the world.
Thank God 

There is No Kannada version of WhatsApp 

otherwise "Last Seen" will be "เฒ…ಂเฒคಿเฒฎ เฒฆเฒฐ್เฒถเฒจ"
Do try this - it's pretty accurate I think.....

In the middle of the table was a round food tray with 5 kinds of fruit in it.

There are:

a. Apple
b. Banana
c. Mango
d. Grapes
e. Orange

Which fruit will u choose?

Your choice reveals about u! 

Pls be very Honest to yourself…..


Now scroll down for results:

Here are the results.
A. if you chosen Apple : that means you are a person who loves to eat Apple

B. if you chosen banana : that means you are a person who loves to eat Banana

C. if you chosen mango : that means you are a person who loves to eat mango

D. if you chosen grapes : that means you are a person who loves to eat grapes

E. if you chosen orange : that means you are person who loves to eat Orange

Note: If you are hunting for me to punch …..Well…I am busy hunting for the person who sent me this!!!!! 

๐Ÿ‘ Release your frustration by forwarding.....

One Day Thomas Edison Came home and gave a paper to his mother. He told her, “My teacher gave this paper to me, and told me to only give it to my mother”.
His mother’s eyes were tearful as she read out the letter aloud to her son : Your child is a genius. This school is too small for him and doesn’t have enough good teachers for training him. Please teach him yourself.
Many years after Edison’s mother died and he was one of the greatest inventors of the century, one day he was looking through the old family things. Suddenly he saw the folded paper in the corner of the drawer in a desk. He took it and opened it up. On the paper it was written: Your son is addled (mentally ill). We won’t let him come to school any more.
Edison cried for hours and then wrote in his diary: “Thomas Alva Adison was an addled child that, by the hero mother, became the genius of the century”
Must read๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ


Absolute Classic!!!

A couple decided to commit suicide. After a rough life, they decided to jump off of a building. When they got to the top, they both counted to three. The man jumped, but the woman stayed. She watched him drop for about 8 seconds and then saw a parachute open. 

Now the question is .......
Who betrayed whom